Life is not a bowl of cherries
round and sweet and red
It's not a box of chocolates
where you don't know what you'll get
You can describe life just like
all the foods you like to eat
But I bit right into life
and found it bittersweet.
How to Use This Handbook
This Guide is to be taken seriously. I have compiled these tips from experience.
The Guide will show you everything you need to know about being an Arch-Villain, from donning a cape to mercilessly crushing those who rise against you. I promise you- with a 100\% money back guarantee- that if you follow this book step-by-step, you’ll never mess up.*
*Promise not to be honored under certain circumstances; e.g., your death or mine.
Introduction: Why choose evil?
Dinner that night began much the same as it always did. Students sat at their customary tables, and youngerclassmen scrambled back and forth with heaping platters of meat and bread. There was a large, roasted pig on a table in the center of the hall, seated on a huge platter and surrounded by baked apple slices. A thin, greasy looking cook with a scruffy beard was using a huge knife to carve off thick slices of pork and set them on trays for the students, while the savory smell of the meat wafted about the room.
Death is almost certain
for that which does not thrive.
And so we must be careful,
to keep our minds alive.
Rescue those who do not grow,
that fall behind and fail.
Bring them up and help them stand,
and over life prevail.
Do not neglect mind or thought.
Study every minute.
If it's only for a thought to think,
there is a profit in it.
Today we suffer from ignorance,
the things we learned forgot.
Why are these things no longer,
and to the children taught?
The world is wide with much to see,
And many sights that wait for me.
So many countries near and far,
And some, I don't know where they are.
Rainy Britain, sunny Spain.
I'll get to them by boat or plane.
I'll travel far to see these places,
Brand new cultures, brand new faces.
So many ways to travel there,
By land, by sea, and by the air.
The great wall of China, the Coliseum of Rome.
I'd much rather travel, than sit at home.
*Chapter One*
Walking five miles in the dark, on a rainy night, isn’t exactly my idea of fun. But sometimes you have to do what you got to do. I pull my coat, a thin, worn-out coat my dad had when he was a kid, closer, and shuddered.
A big truck roars past, throwing dirty water all over me. I pull my navy blue hat lower over my eyes, hoping not to be noticed by the driver. Which should be pretty easy; I’m basically ignored unless I’m being teased.
Once, there were kitties,
Six of them and no pities.
They all came from one cat,
And most of them weren’t too fat!
Six little kitties grew more and more each day,
More and more they began to play.
They liked to play fight,
And they were all really bright.
Six kitties each had a cute name,
All of them were really quite tame.
They all had pretty, swishy tails,
And none of them got scratched by nails!
Dancing Leaves
Leaves are dancing through the air.
Dancing here and dancing there.
They drift down to the earth,
To silently sleep in a dusty berth.
Their change was slow at first,
A natural part in the Creation that sin cursed.
First through the green, yellow came
Then it made a scarlet flame.
The trees are now a brilliant parade of gold
Like the Kings and Queens of old.
The clouds race through a sea of blue,
Sending all that gold swirling down to you.
Slimy's Apple
(Story number one)
"Melissa," Mom said in her serious voice, looking distraught. "I don't feel comfortable with this.....I'm not leaving you here. Richard, what do you think?"
"I think....I think that she should try. Mel is growing up, Debs. She needs some freedom," Dad said unsurely.
Mel beamed at her Dad and Gran put her arm around Mel's shoulders.
"Richard! We can't just leave Mel, a thirteen year old girl, here without us in a foreign country!" Mom gasped, whirling on her husband and speaking with quite the edge.