Publishing a poetry book and chose this poem to be in it! Wish me luck, friends! :")

It's funny how a melody
Can sound like a memory.
It's strange how a simple song
Can, somehow, be louder
Than a gong.

I still remember the sound of your voice.
I still remember your choice,
To leave me for her,
And yank me off, like a
Stubbornly clinging burr.

Why do I still wish you were here,
When you've been gone for more than a year?
Why do I still think you will come,
Refusing to let go,
Even when I know you are gone?

Rain never falls upon this land.
The heat is strong, the shrubs are dry,
And dust flies loosely all around,
Under a shimmering, glaring sky.

My feet are scorched by frying sand;
My head is burned by angry rays;
I wend upon this flaming ground,
And watch the hours turn into days.

At night it cools, yet no relief
Will comfort in my turning sleep;
The air oppressively berates;
My rest is neither sound nor deep.

There’s two ways to look at the cup in your hand
Two ways to look at a day
Two ways to live
Two ways to walk
And two ways to see your life.

The cup could be, of course, half-empty
You could focus on the pain
And gripe and moan in emptiness
Ignore the gift just giv’n.
You are pitied most, dear friend—
Your gaze, misplaced, is greed.

OR—

Previous Chapter

Had God created me for pain? He had raised me up and blessed me that I might fall further. Instead of being bruised, I was broken.

"It would have been better if I had not been born!" I cried to God, "Why did You give me a sister, Lord? To break my heart with? And why did You make me prosper so young? To agitate me with? And why oh why did you bring Sarah into my life? To crush my soul with! God, Your ways are cruel against man.

Previous Chapter

lying on the floor
staring at the space
below the door
sobbing
praying
wanting to go numb
wishing I could close my eyes
and this day would be done
wanting to sleep
in a dark room
and live in my dreams
or else
float away
to somewhere warm and hazy
somewhere numb
I don't want to feel
anything
anymore
but maybe
the sun will rise tomorrow
the world will be clear and bright
and I will be glad that I am not numb
maybe

(I was inspired by a video I watched, titled 'Long Distance Relationship'. All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Hope you like it!)

Crooked teeth shy eyes
What love can do to a boy
They met in Marseilles
She said, "Hi my name is Joy."

He's her chéri, but
Time and planes are similar
They fly by quickly
Ending in a sepulchre

Old crumpled tickets
Memories of a tough love
In his chest pocket
She's all he ever thought of

Pretty, amazing, awesome
People have got to stop complimenting me
I’m not like those heroines who have a lot of gumption
If I am, why am I the only one who can’t see?

I have come to accept the simple truth
That I’m plain, never good enough, a horrible person
Just a lonely, untalented youth
As I grow, the pain only worsens

“Such a disappointment”, he said
Is this the cold, harsh reality?
Have I been fooling myself because I was afraid?
Will no one ever learn to love me?

This isn't even a real essay. It's probably the worst in terms of grammar that I've written in years. Usually, when I write, I try to put emotion and a sort of magic in the words. Here, I tried to avoid emotion and magic was the last thing on my mind. I tried to create almost a listing of the facts. But here you go, my excuse as to why I've been hiding the last month or so. 

~*~