To Do List

To do; recall lost days
(the faded memories of
lazy summer sundays)

pay last months gas bill
return Janie's books
donation to goodwill

(the things you know you
never use, but can't ignore)

sew Rose a blue blanket,
or maybe green
call the invisible local

(to see if he's coming home
sober)

the car parked on the lawn yesterday
the window in pieces, alas, broken
the bottles in the rhododendrons

JUST...in case you're interested....my 10-page research paper. This is pretty much the final except I didn't put in the sources. When I do, I'll probably put it in. And yes, probably this essay is dull. But if anyone would give their thoughts, I would be elated. Really happy. {I would squeal with joy.} :) - Megan

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Browse

Mmph
I must have been going through my
Rebellious phase
As I skim back through my
Nose crinkles up in a way
That signifies my distaste
It's really quite strange how quickly a change
Can happen to someone in the span of some days
Ticked off so quickly if you're not sat there counting
I click away and go back to
My 12 am browsing

Mornings

I’ll never forget the moment
I first told you that I love you,
thinking you’d be happy—
as happy as you’ve made me.
I can’t forget the fear inside,
watching your face fall instead.
Now you’re pushing me away,
telling me I shouldn’t stay,
telling me I shouldn’t love you,
that I’m better off without you,
certain I’d no longer love you,
If I only knew...

1. Unnecessary Sharing
He slides his eyes sideways to capture my reaction
I work hard to keep my face unchanged
It’s okay, no big deal
I didn’t ask for his opinion anyway.

2. Emote
Your face is an open book
You can transform into someone else
In an instant
I’m getting tired of trying to keep up
With your mood swings and changes
It’s too hard to help somebody
Who is so far gone.

Anxiety
Anxiety keeps my blood warm,
My feet ice cold.
Waiting in worried silence,
And nervously laughing,
At my pathetic behavior.
I shouldn't be this tight,
Every muscle tense with impatience,
Every breath restrained,
Against a constricted chest.

Too Far
The distance between us,
Land and sea,
Is emblematic of how I feel,
Stretched out,
Thinning,
Flattening,
So far from you,
Separated by miles and air,
Too far from you.

His breaths are copper leaves ripped from a cedar.
She hears the gale in his chest rattle the blinds.
Before the bed can roll over to smother them,
She heaves it off, hearing the storm slam into the window.
She tastes the salt in the downpour, feels
wetness speckle the backs of her hands.
“Abraham’s tree has its foot in the water”—
at this staticky song of the weather report,
she laces her boots with typha, lifts him
in one thin arm, and cradles him over miles of
sharp puddles. They slice at her soles, but she splashes

I: Falling
I'm falling hard
I'm falling fast
in too deep
I hope it lasts
these thoughts of you
won't let me be
I wonder if
you think of me?
I'll find a way
to where you are
you know the way
into my heart
only time will tell
I guess
but until then
I'll be a mess

please don't say that
they're breaking my heart
i'm tearing myself apart and they're just watching

who needs them anyway
come on, we're leaving

brushing hair out of my face
"we'll prove them all wrong."

i wonder how long that promise will last
you'll get bored eventually
they all do, in the end

i'll just wait out the next few years
their words are all lies anyway
it burns, it stings, it pierces

slicing away, they don't even care

i'm bound by my word, though

Oh dear, so I haven't posted on here in... a while... sorry. :( I do have a reasonable excuse- I've been dealing with three energetic and dramatic children all day everyday... And a move to another country... and learning a new language...
Don't worry, I haven't stopped writing, but I haven't had much of a chance to even get online or anything recently. Anyways, I just thought I'd give an update on where I am and let you know that I've learned something extremely well recently: things never go as planned...