Mindless

Submitted by Madeline on Fri, 12/13/2013 - 13:54

You are casually up against me
I know that's where my world lies
In those hands, decorated hands
Though it's less in your control than mine

Oh, tilt your head back, let me see them eyes
Oh, poor thing, you're running out of my time

And oh, I'll tilt mine, tilt it far to the side
And oh, poor you, they're all out of their mind

You are casually up against them
You know that's where their world lies
In those hands, decorated hands
You try your best but--
It's more in your control than mine

Author's age when written
16
Genre
Notes

Okay. I be done after this for a while. :) Anyway, it's really hard to just not post, even though everything seems up in the air at the moment. Feedback? :) Thanks. -Homey

Comments

Don't not post! Anyway, this had a really cool rhythm. :)

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

If you stop posting I'm personally sending you a heated email telling you how good your writing is and how silly you are being!!!! Who cares if you have four posts up? We love them! You inspire us to write more!
This was interesting... Maybe you could give a bit of back story or secret author information out on this one, because I couldn't understand the actual story or meaning to it... But it fascinated me and made me agrivated because I didn't know the story!!! Love it... Sooo... What's he back story? What's the meaning?

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Haha! Aw, thank you! And, oh, I'll give the vague description: about how a person with higher power can use that against those around them, I guess. And how the people think it's in their control, but it's not, really. :D And anyway, that's the really VAGUE description! LOL!

I liked this, never mind what the meaning was. I think the rhythm is really good, don't YOU DARE STOP POSTING! ;)

Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can’t we just go back to page one and start all over again?” – Winnie The Pooh

Maybe everyone else just needs to post more. ;)

This was very interesting.
Loved this bit:
Oh, tilt your head back, let me see them eyes
Oh, poor thing, you're running out of my time

And oh, I'll tilt mine, tilt it far to the side
And oh, poor you, they're all out of their mind

And vague poetry can be fun, it's a stretch for the reader's imagination...there are so many ways it could go...

The most astonishing thing about miracles is that they happen.
-G. K. Chesterton