be.

Submitted by Madeline on Mon, 03/19/2012 - 18:56

HI Guys! 

Thoughts? Thanks! 

-Homey :)

---------------------------------

Perhaps if I were

Easier to see

To touch

To know

Then I would have friends

 

Perhaps if I were

Nicer to you

To them

To him

Then I would not stand alone

 

Perhaps if I were

A bit prettier

Mascara

Lipstick

Then I would not be single

 

Perhaps if I were

To laugh when they tease me

Giggle

That's So True

Then I would smile more

 

Perhaps if I were

Less Awkward

Big ears

N-no stutter

Then I would be more popular

 

Perhaps if I were

Stronger a person

Standing here

Contemplating

Then I would not be doing this

 

Perhaps if I were

Not so afraid

Throw up

Hunger

Then I would be full

 

Perhaps if I were

Keen on being myself

Forget them

But what about me?

Then I would
 

be.

Author's age when written
14
Genre

Comments

That was really good. I could have done without the bold, but I see what you were doing, so it was still cool :D

"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond

 I like this - and you make a very good point! 

 Wonderful job!

I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right. --The Book Thief

Love the description and image the poem reflected! Why were you using bold? That is the only thing that stood out to me (and I'm sure it's suppose to! Ha Ha!). I loved it!

Write on!

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Thank you both! 

@Kass--I used bold to emphasize key words to the peom. Basically, the things in each stanza I was talking about. :D They're also for a visiual effect. Thanks! 

Thanks to everyone who commented!!

The rhythm's really good, and... wow! I just love it! The idea with the bold thing, that's really awesome. Great job!

(just going through your profile here.)

Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can’t we just go back to page one and start all over again?” – Winnie The Pooh