I hope no one thinks that I am copying the other people (like Heather or Lori Ann) who have written stories like this. I wrote this very late at night (about 10:30, to be exact) and my brain was rather fried. I had to keep the story in the visinity of 500 to 600 words and I couldn't write a "normal" fairy-tale about serious things like that so I wrote this instead. I have been hesitant about putting it up, but like I said, I wasn't copying so here it is!!! :)
><>><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><
George the knight was depressed; the kingdom in which he served had recently suffered from dragon depletion and that, combined with the growing popularity of baseball caps instead of metal helmets, was one of the chief reasons for his melancholy mood. The other was the decline in the number of “Damsels in Distress”. Girls these days just didn’t seem to want to fall into a pool of quicksand, get captured by a dragon, or bite into an apple that is obviously poisoned. Yes, George the knight was in a real fix; what ever would he do with himself now?
After nearly and entire day of looking for something that required a knight’s aid, George decided that, if he could not find the dragons or damsels in distress, they would just have to find him. So he sprang onto the back of his faithful steed, a mule named Jenkins, and rode away into the very heart of a range of mountains to live. For about six years, George and Jenkins (along with a couple of goats to keep the mule company) lived quite contentedly in their little house. No one bothered them except the occasional adventurer seen floating over the tops of their mountains in a hot-air balloon. Life was care-free and peaceful until one day while George was outside a messenger rode up breathlessly.
“Sir George,” he cried “Your services are needed at once! The fair Queen Lorraine has been taken captive by an evil dragon. He says that he will not release her until we send a knight who can beat him at three contests which he will announce. We have sent every knight we could find, but they all have returned defeated. You are our last hope!” George thought about it for a moment, and then he whistled for his donkey and they were on their way.
The messenger led him to a great cave and bade him enter to fight the dragon. “Remember, you are our last hope!” he cried. George crept deep into the darkness of the cave with his armor rattling (it hadn’t been oiled for some time) and his sword at the ready. He saw a light up ahead and a voice called,
“Hulp! Someone save me!”
“Never fear good maiden, I am….” Unfortunately just as je was giving his battle cry, he tripped on something and fell down with a clatter. The thing he had tripped on was, of course, the dragon. George almost laughed at it (thankfully he remembered his “knighting for Dummies” book, pg. 33 which read “Never laugh at a dragon. They have sensitive feelings and very hot breath!”) for this dragon stood barley even 3 feet tall. It looked at him and said,
“You must be another one of those ridiculous knights that those people keep sending up here. Well, let’s get started on the contests,” The dragon led George to a big underground lake.
“Now, the first contest will be ‘who can skip the rock the most’” George smiled, it just so happened that every Saturday night he would go down to a lake to skip rocks and he was one of the best. He won the contest hands down. The dragon turned a little red and angry looking. No one was usually able to beat him at anything.
The next contest was “who can milk the goat the fastest”. Living by himself all those years with several goats proved to be in George’s favor. The dragon was now definitely a darker shade of red.
“Well, there’s no way you can win this last one. After you lose, I’ll smoke you!” it seethed. “Getting a pastry onto a fork and eating it without making any crumbs” was something that George wasn’t good at, but neither was the dragon because most of the knights who can to challenge him never made it this far.
After they ate, the dragon pulled out a magnifying glass and came over to George’s section of tablecloth. This search was rewarded by one little crumb right in the center.
“Ha-ha! I’ve won!” he cried.
“What about your section?” George asked him. The dragon sulkily brought his magnifying glass over the other section. There, on the cloth was, not one, not two, but three crumbs! The little dragon turned very red, stomped his foot three times, and then disappeared with a puff of smoke.
George ran to free the Queen, who jumped into his arms crying,
“Ma Hero!” and as is tradition, they lived happily, ever after!