Can you hear me? Please try. Please hear me mamma. I want to know you. Why don’t you want to know me? Why don’t you feel my longing? Why don’t you feel my yearning? Why can’t you understand my love for you?

Mamma, I want to see your beautiful face. I want to hear your voice murmur softly. I want to feel your hands gently caress me. I want you to love me. I just can’t understand this. Why are you so blind to my miracle?

Do you remember your mamma? Can you see her face? Can you hear her voice? Can you feel her touch? Do you know that she loves you? She proved her love for you through all those years. Do you understand that she chose to let you live? She let you have all those memories. Why cut me off from having memories like yours, only of you?  Help me to have those memories. You must not just allow this to pass.

Do you remember what it was like, waiting for the suns first rays to shine on your first day? Waiting to see your mamma’s face, gazing into your eyes tenderly? Waiting to hear her voice murmur softly? Waiting for her to kiss you gently? Waiting to smell her fragrance? Waiting to grip her finger eagerly? Waiting to walk where she would lead you?

You will deprive me of all that. Why?
You shut out my voice. Why?
You ignore the tugging at your heart. Why?
You know that your choice will kill me, and yet you turn your back on me. Why?
You crush a working miracle. Why?
You stop my waiting heart. Why?
You cover your eyes and close your ears, blocking my cries. Why?
You choose to remain blind from the truth. Why?

I will never witness the first ray of sunlight on my first day. 
My eyes will never see the face, like yours did.
My ears will never here the soft murmur, like yours did.
My mouth will never feel the kiss, like yours did.
My nose will never smell the fragrance, like yours did.
My hands will never ever grip the finger, like yours did.
My feet will never have someone to lead them, like yours did. 

How can I make you understand? Will you understand how I felt once I’m gone? Will you ever know? Will you ever try to comprehend it? Do you know now, but just wish not to have to accept it? My heart is aching for you, breaking for you. But you do not see it! Everything will disappear with me when I leave. You think the pain will be gone, but it will hurt worse then ever, even if you smile. Even if you paste a face on, you will feel utterly wretched in your inner self. But will you know it was wrong? Will you except help when it tries to come for you? Will you be able to face yourself and ask for repentance from Him who saves? Or will you be too covered in your shame?
     Think about me. Pray about me. Know who I am inside of you. I can see you, cowering, half alive, from the world. Wait mamma, don’t break apart yet, it’s not too late. You can still save me.

Please don’t deprive me of my life.
Please don’t shut my voice out.
Please don’t ignore the tugging from within.
Please don’t choose to kill me.
Please don’t turn your back on me.
Please don’t crush a working miracle.
Please don’t stop my waiting heart.
Please don’t cover your eyes.
Please don’t close your ears.
Please don’t block out my cries.
Please don’t choose to remain blind from the truth.

You alone can help my eyes to see.
Help my ears to hear.
Help my mouth to feel.
Help my nose to smell.
Help my hands to grip.
Help my feet to be lead.

Do you see now? Do you understand now? Do you know now?
Please see. Please understand. Please know, mamma...you can save me.