(I'm in a Creative Writing class this semester, and it's allowing me more time to "fool around" with my writing while I'm at school, as well as challenging me to go deeper... Here's just a few random sketches from the writing journal I'm keeping.)
The sky was ominous, choked with angry clouds, dragging the evening into night with a heavy hand.
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Somewhere in the dark of last night, the sun died. I see her ghost has risen--slow, silent--to meet the expectant day. A still, pale orb in an ocean of mist, like a feeble echo of the angelus bell from the town across the river.
Slowly, slowly, the ocean's waves wash the still, pale face.
My heart stops.
As the tide ebbs away, the sun is coming back to life again. Her color, her smile return. The quiet, breathless world explodes into a bright, glad song.
Alleluia.
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The puddles on the sidewalk, try as she might to avoid them, were making the hem of her pants wet. They slapped around her ankles now, cold and unnerving. The rain had slowed to a haphazard sort of drizzle--but that was worse than the downpour, somehow.
At any rate, she was cold, wet, and exhausted. And it was a long way home.
Comments
I love the imagery in the
I love the imagery in the second part, Aisling! The first paragraph is better than any bestselling author I've ever read!
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And now our hearts will beat in time/You say I am yours and you are mine...
Michelle Tumes, "There Goes My Love"
Holy cow. That was amazing!
Holy cow. That was amazing! You need to get published! The imagery is (as the others said) absolutely stunning! I could see and feel everything so clearly. Give me writing lessons :-) lol.
"You were not meant to fit into a shallow box built by someone else." -J. Raymond
It's always nice to see the
It's always nice to see the fine phrases that boil to the top of someone's writing...
Formerly Kestrel
*shivers and chills*
Oh wow. This was amazing. The first sentence was almost reminiscent of Stephen R. Lawhead's style - but the rest was just ... wow!
I'm with Heather - better than a bestseller! Has any of your work ever been published?
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Brother: Your character should drive a motorcycle.
Me: He can't. He's in the wilderness.
Brother: Then make it a four-wheel-drive motorcycle!
Stunning
Aisling, your writing is downright beautiful. This was so lovely...thanks for sharing.
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"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve." -Bilbo Baggins [The Lord of the Rings]
I love this part best:
I love this part best: "Slowly, slowly, the ocean's waves wash the still, pale face." Beautiful and creepy at the same time.
"I always wonder why birds stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the earth. Then I ask myself the same question." - Harun Yahya
My favorite part was "At any
My favorite part was "At any rate, she was cold, wet, and exhausted. And it was a long way home." Sort of like, "Okay, enough poetry. I'm wet already!" :)
Very nice, Aisling! I keep a
Very nice, Aisling! I keep a writing journal. In it, I try to write down whenever I have an idea for a story, or when I finish writing a book, or whether I like what I've written. Journals are nice, because you can read about lots of stuff you've forgotten about. Anyways, I liked your quotes. ---Laura Elizabeth
Lovely
I really, really enjoyed reading this! I felt as though I was reading out of a book! The imagery was just stunning!!
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The Holy Spirit is the quiet guest of our soul." -St. Augustine