The Crow

Submitted by Kassady on Thu, 07/14/2016 - 19:45

I watch with wary eye the perched crow,
Though his movement be idle,
As his black beaded eyes lust for company,
Empathy another binding title.
He opens his sharp tongued beak
To speak of other grackle,
With which he fights for sky;
My approval he hopes to tackle.
Black breast reflecting the sun,
-Won over once by mischievous eyes-
Bejeweled face with obsidian,
A meridian left of tears and lies.
I call upon his wings to rest,
Breast beating with uncertainty,
But midnight feathers flap to outstretched arm,
No alarm of heart with new loyalty.

Author's age when written
18
Genre
Poetry
Notes

Gonna make a series page soon! Let me know your thoughts ;)

Comments

Damaris Ann

Thu, 07/14/2016 - 23:51

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I LOVE this! I could picture it all in my mind's eye and absolutely love the imagery you used. And they rhyming. Ooh it's good.

I don’t thrive off of chaos: chaos thrives off of me.

Kassady

Fri, 07/15/2016 - 01:21

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Damaris and Hannah, thank you both so much for your lovely comments!!!! I'm so glad it portrayed a good visual! I love playing with words and imagery and hoped this would create a clear image.
Hannah, the obsidian and meridian rhyme is due to the meter of the poem which is the poetry meter Tolkien created for his poem Errantry (it's such a fun poem you should look it up)!
Thank you both so much!

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Wings of Eternity

Sun, 07/17/2016 - 20:44

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Oh Kassady! I love, love, love this! The imagery and rhyme are perfection. I adore when writers step outside of the box with poetry and do some more daring rhymes, especially using rhythm. I love Tolkien and can see a hint of his influence in this :) Great job! Blessings to you!

P.S. Would totally love a series of this ;)

"Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity." 1 Timothy 4:12

Kassady

Tue, 07/19/2016 - 14:00

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Thank you so much for your awesome comment! I love feeling so supported here on AP! The best compliment by far is probably your mention that this feels Tolkienish, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!
And it'll be slow work to post all of what will go on a series page (I don't want to drown the home page with all my bird/crow related poetry) haha, but I shall eventually, thank you!

"Here's looking at you, Kid"
---
Write On!

Madeline

Thu, 07/21/2016 - 11:35

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I love this bird-inspired series! I feel all you need now are some illustrations and you could make it a little collection. Beautiful work! Your rhythm and rhyme are both dynamic and spirited--it adds another layer of interest entirely to the poem beyond its words. **Edited for bad grammar. lol!