Rebound
You always seemed to be the rebound type, 
Always thought you'd bounce back quickly.
You would think two months is long enough, 
That you'd be over me, 
But I guess I'm not over you,
So touché, 
It's just you always seemed to be the rebound type, 
I guess not, 
Because we're not friends, 
So far as I know you haven't bounced back, 
And you're probably playing video games, 
On the couch,
On your own. 

Ceremony
I can feel eyes upon me, 
Cheeks brighten, 
Face growing warm with, 
Embarrassment?
Excitement? 
Fright? 
Nervousness? 
My eyes look out,
But do not see,
All I can do is smile, 
Feeling like my limbs are too long, 
Every part of me feeling awkward, 
With so many sets of eyes, 
Looking up at my award, 
Looking up at me, 
Don't know if I should feel pleased or nauseous. 
I feel out of place,
Being cheered instead of cheering, 
Feels so silly, 
And stiff,
And oh goodness,
It's more than a hundred people watching me, 
Too many cute guys to look at, 
Too many people looking at me.

Classy
Sometimes I wish I could be the flirtatious type, 
Give out my number on a whim, 
Wink, 
Wave, 
Grin, 
And bat my eyes back at him. 
Sometimes I wish I was just a bit more free, 
Free spirited, 
Free from my own conscious to do what I want, 
And that want is to be just a bit wild, 
Flirt, 
Giggle, 
Smile,
And wave, 
Get the attention I want, 
The attention that shouldn't be wanted, 
By a gentle young lady, 
The well-mannered lady I am today, 
Who instead smiles slyly, 
Looking up and away.
Aloof, 
Friendly, 
Pleasant and casual, 
Afraid sometimes to make eye contact, 
Slowly easing into cheerful conversations, 
Even with the cute waiter. 
I guess I'm just too mature, 
For all the silliness that comes, 
With being a flirt, 
And there's just something respectable, 
And classy about a gal playing hard to get, 
Or at least that's what I think, 
How I feel about it,
When I am, 
Being respectfully classy. 

Off Day
Lazy morning turns into afternoon, 
A day flown by with nothing, 
Nothing accomplished but procrastination. 
Guilty somewhat for wasting time, 
I wish I had done more, 
But somehow it was nice, 
Because I'm exhausted from life, 
Just a bit tired of everything going on, 
And I needed an off day. 

Comforting
Out of everything you were, 
You were comforting, 
And despite your many shortcomings, 
The qualities that I found so dissatisfying, 
Your comfort is something I miss most. 
At first I didn't, 
But after awhile I loved you holding me, 
Your arms grew to be a second home. 
Maybe sometimes it was awkward, 
But in some ways, 
Our silence was just as comfortable. 
Time flew by, 
My heart grew found and you became my shoulder, 
You were the one I'd escape to, 
When my life got too chaotic. 
It's that comfort I found that I long for now, 
Wish I could, 
Just one more time, 
Feel at home in your embrace. 

I Wish My Heart
I wish my heart were a fortress, 
Solid, 
Grounded,
Unfailing,
Impenetrable. 
Only friends baring good will, 
Would be able to safely pass through the gates, 
The gates which are my mind, 
Which open and close. 
I wish my heart were a fortress, 
Sealed and safe from harm, 
Walls strong, 
Unscalable, 
Unable to crumble. 
What's so romantic about breaking through walls? 
What's so pleasing about guards coming down? 
Keep the walls surrounding my heart whole, 
Become my friend, 
Come through the gates, 
Let me let you in, 
Keep the walls up, 
Because I wish my heart were a fortress, 
Instead of a dam, 
Leaking, 
Built up on itself, 
Protection made of scraps nearby, 
Thrown together to stop the flow, 
The river that is my mind, 
The waters that are my emotions.
Stop my heart from overflowing out and around me, 
When the dam leaks or breaks,
Mixed feelings with my memories, 
My thoughts, 
Logic sinking like stones to the bottom, 
Sometimes like sticks, which float away, 
Carried off by emotions and fantasies. 
I wish my heart were a fortress, 
And maybe then, 
I'd know how to guard it better, 
I'd contain it better, 
Control it better, 
Or maybe it would just take control of me,
Rule over everything savagely? 
Medieval in it's way of loving, 
In it's way of feeling, 
Walled up inside, 
Except now with weapons of destructions, 
Sent out the gates of my mind. 
Maybe then I wish my mind were a tree,
Grounded, 
Living, 
One with nature,
Whole and growing up towards the light. 
Home to the birds, 
My branches of thought would reach heavenward, 
Searching for the light of knowledge, 
And my roots would soak in the healing of the earth. 
I wish my heart were a tree then,
Soaking in the rain, 
The sun, 
The soil, 
Whole and healthy,
Content and always growing. 
Yet, unable to protect itself, 
Unable to defend.
My heart, a tree, standing helpless, 
Unable to move, 
Peacefully growing, 
What happens when someone cuts the tree in half? 
Splits it's bark,
Hangs it out to dry, 
And then burns it? 
What can a tree do to lovingly stop this attack? 
Nothing, 
It falls. 
So maybe I wish my heart to be a home, 
Built with walls, 
With doors and windows, 
A roof and a warm inside,
But cannot a home be broken into,
Rummaged through, 
Pillaged, 
Ransacked, 
Burned down, 
Or torn apart? 
Cannot the price of a healthy house become too expensive, 
Cannot a house be abandoned, 
Or sold?
So should I wish my heart were the ocean, 
Endless, 
Wild, 
Free, 
Stormy, 
And beautiful? 
Ships sail on the open water, 
But it is the sea who decides to keep them there, 
Divers will try to explore deep down,
But no matter how far they go into the depths, 
There will always be a level deeper, 
Unseen, 
Safe, 
Secret, 
Untouchable. 
So yes, 
I wish my heart were the ocean, 
Filled with life, 
Emotion, 
Dark and light, 
Full of secrets, 
Contradictions,
Power, 
Yet somehow a tender weakness. 
I wish my heart were the sea, 
And when someone new tried to own me, 
I could simply engulf them, 
Drown them in my love, 
And show them this heart cannot be tamed, 
Cannot be tied, 
Torn, 
Burned, 
Cannot crumble or fall, 
But can surround you with endless love, 
As long as I'm loved in return,
As long as I am free.
I wish my heart were the ocean, 
Unpredictable, 
Healthy,
Whole, 
And endlessly full of love. 

Throwing A Fit
Soar disappointment, 
Bitter on my tongue, 
Stinging in my eyes. 
Proven I'm wrong, 
Feels like I'm always wrong, 
So melodramatic, 
I feel like the most emotional, 
Pathetic, 
Blubbering, 
Baby, 
That throws a fit, 
When I don't get my way.
I hate the tears that fall, 
Making feel like such a child, 
God! 
I'm almost seventeen, 
Being told "no" shouldn't turn me, 
Turn me into a wet mess. 

Cute Guy #1
Sociable yet reserved, 
Your smile lights up your face, 
Making me smile, 
Astonishing resemblance between you and old friends,
Like an older vision of a ten year old, 
So cute. 
I'd make some move, 
Some act of flirtation, 
If it weren't for the lack of passion, 
Lack of future goals, 
And of inspiration, 
That was off-putting, 
Despite how charming you were.

Cute Guy #2
Handsome from head to toe, 
From afar you look dashing,
Up close you give off a somewhat goofy energy, 
An easily excitable, 
Busy butterfly, 
Flitting about in boredom, 
Pacing the floor in impatience. 
You turn quickly to her voice that engages, 
Eyes hopeful for some means of something to do.
We play I Spy with you, 
A complete stranger, 
But it amuses all of us, 
And keeps you from pacing.
Smiling in a bashful yet charming way, 
You warm up to my eye contact, 
You drop your keys, 
And then turn to leave. 
She says while you were talking to the both of us, 
Wishing we'd meet again, 
Your eyes only met mine,
And you left with a smile, 
Hoping to play I-spy again.