My heart is thudding as I head back toward the room, keeping a towel around my wet hair. After drying off and putting on some fresh clothes, I realized I’d have to come back here. To where Connor is. Waiting for me.

What should I do when I see him? Should I tell him? Should I…I dunno, kiss him or something? At that moment I realize how incredibly stupid and impulsive I am. If someone I liked-liked asked me to marry him, I’d probably say yes. If Trixie asked me to go to Vegas with her, well, why not? Even though that’s never going to happen because I’m not allowed out of the compound at the moment, and I don’t even know where Vegas is.

I take a moment outside of the door to collect myself and my emotions before very slowly turning the handle.

Connor is still there, all right. But he’s asleep. I smile at his expression. It’s so peaceful, serene…so happy. I keep the towel on my head, going to sit cross-legged on my bed, just watching him. Totally creepy, I know.

I jump a bit when the door swings open and Caroline comes trotting in. She frowns at Connor before quietly shutting the door behind her. I motion for her to come sit beside me, and she does.

Has he been asleep long?

I shake my head, whispering, “Don’t think so. I just got out of the shower. He bought me home because…” The memories resurface, and I close my eyes. “Of something Josh said. Because of something Josh said.”

Caroline doesn’t pat my hand like Trixie would, or give me a sympathetic look. She just stares. I feel like those rainbow eyes of her see right through me. I squirm.

“What’s wrong?” I ask after a long minute.

She shrugs. Nothing…it’s just that you seem so strong, and tough. And then if a stupid guy says the wrong thing, automatically you’re scarred. It doesn’t make sense.

Although I should probably take that as offensive, I don’t.

“Well, I like to put up a good front. And besides levitation, strength is my other advantage. At least, I pretend it is. But you, and Trixie, and Connor, you all can see I’m faking it. I don’t know how to handle it.”

She puts her chin in her hands, studying Connor.

He looks cute when he sleeps, doesn’t he?

I don’t miss the impish grin she has on her face. I roll my eyes, playfully shoving her. “Positively adorable, dahling!”

She giggles at my accent. Yes, dahling. Just too cute for words.

“Hot as an iron!” I exclaim dramatically, throwing my hands back.

When I lower my hands, I see Connor staring at me. Awake. Figures.

“You heard all of that…didn’t you?” I ask in a flat monotone.

He nods. “Well, at least your end.”

Caroline giggles and shuffles from the room, keeping her head down, bursting out in sporadic fits of laughter.

“So…” Connor says, looking at me. “Who were you discussing?”

I blush, look at my hands. “You.”

He laughs. “Hot as an iron? That’s the best you could come up with?”

“Well…I…” I look around, hoping to gather inspiration. “Hot as a light bulb.”

He swings his legs over the side of my bed, reaching forward to pat my knee. “Whoa there, Kitty. Slow down. That’s much too risqué!”

I roll my eyes. “Hot as…summer. Hotter than hot. Hotter than…”

“The sun?”

“Yes!” I grin with satisfaction. “Hotter than the sun. Perfect.”

“Who are we discussing at this point?”

I wrinkle my nose. “Don’t know. Definitely not you.”

“Definitely not,” he agrees, and then leans back. Before my eyes, he shifts into a brooding boy with ink-colored hair and a bored expression. “Perhaps me.”

“No!” I throw my pillow at him. “Absolutely, positively, never Josh!”

He snorts. “You sure? Apparently, you kissed him.”

I swallow. “He…he kissed me. I swear.”

“Kitty-“ Connor grabs my hand. “I don’t doubt you. I was kidding.”

“Right.”

“Yes. Right.”

The door bangs open and Trixie comes charging in, black hair wild around her face. Both Connor and I jerk up into a straighter position, slightly embarrassed.

“I’m going to kill Josh,” she spits.

“What?” I ask. “Why?”

“Because of what he did to you! Are you okay?” She looks over at Connor. “Thank you for stopping her.” Then back to me. “You. Are. A. Fool. A first-class idiot! How could you be so incredibly dense? You could have been killed today!”

“Ah, but I wasn’t,” I say with a grin, slightly teasing.

Trixie hits me on the arm. Not too lightly, either.

“No! You weren’t! Maybe you should have been, if that’s what you wanted.” She takes a deep breath, blinking back tears. “Do you not understand what it’s like to lose someone you’re close with?”

“I do,” I say softly. “I do know how that feels.”

“Really? Like losing your best friend?”

“I understand how that feels!”

“I don’t think you do, Kathryn! I don’t think you know anything!”

Surprise; hurt, is suddenly front and foremost in my mind. “What is that supposed to mean? Of course I know things.”

The pink-haired boy still sitting on my bed laughs. “Are you two really arguing about the extent of your knowledge?”

“Shut up, Connor,” Trixie snaps, without looking away from me.

He grimaces. “Trix…“

“I said to shut up.”

I look back and forth between them wildly. I don’t want to have this fight. I don’t want any part of this.

“Trixie, I’m sorry. I was stupid and, well.” I shrug. “What do you want me to do? I apologized. I meant it.”

A few tears slip down her cheeks. She wipes them away with the back of her hand. “I want you to promise me you won’t ever try to run again.”

I laugh. “I’m not stupid.”

Her lower lip quivers. “Then. Say. It.”

I exhale slowly. “But I can’t. Then I’d be lying.”

“SAY IT NOW, KATHRYN!”

I look at Josh, bewildered. What is this about? “Trixie, no! I probably will have to run again, if I don’t win this competition.”

“You can’t! They’d kill you.”

“I’d rather die trying than to live wondering if I could have made it!”

“Then you’re an idiot!”

“I think we’ve established that.”

“I don’t want to lose anyone else,” she says, hands shaking. “I can’t bear it. I can’t do it. Not after Livi.”

“Trixie-“ I reach forward to hug her, suddenly understanding. But she backs away.

“I can’t,” she says in a choked whisper. “I can’t be your friend anymore.”

I watch, broken, as she turns and hurries from the room. I feel horrible. I hadn’t intended for any of that to happen.

“Great,” I say, hands shaking as I sink back down on the bed. “She hates me.”

“She’ll come around,” Connor says, officially dismissing the subject with three words. He morphs into pink-haired boy, stands and sticks his hands deep into the pockets of his black skinny jeans. “Just hang in there, okay? Don’t do anything irrational.”

I force a smile. “Come on, me? Do something insane?”

“You’d never do that,” He jokes. His eyes bore into mine, a little longer than usual. “I mean it, Kitty. I really do.”

“Yeah. Fine.”

“You have too many people counting on you.”

“Yeah. Fine.”

“And you have your family-“

“YEAH. FINE.”

He laughs. “Okay, okay.”

I shove past him, toward the door, then realize I’m leaving my own room to get away from him. I turn around. “Could…you…?” I make a nonsensical motion with my hand. He nods.

“Yeah.”

I turn my eyes down as he brushes past me, willing myself not to meet his black ones. My head feels like it’s about to go to pieces.

I end up sleeping.

________

Caroline shakes me awake.

Practice.

I groan. “How long have I been asleep?”

She sits down on the edge of the bead. Her hair is loose around her shoulders. She’s wearing baggy clothes. Her cheeks are hollow. She looks—

“Are you sick?”

She shakes her head. No. I’ve just been feeling down lately. I’m fine.

I heave myself up out of bed. “What…time…is it?”

She crawls into her bed. Midnight. I’m going to sleep.

I pull off my clothes and hurriedly change into green cargo pants and a black t- shirt. Before our fight earlier today, Trixie explained this was the standard uniform for practices like this. Late night ones.

“Feel better, okay?”

She nods. I shut my door quietly behind me and creep down the stairs. Selena is waiting by the door. She stifles a yawn when she sees me.

“You—out. Coach is going to be mad if you’re late.”

I shiver in the frigid air coming from the open door. “What are we doing?”

She shrugs. “I have no idea. Be careful, okay?” She places a firm hand on my shoulder. “And don’t pull stuff like you did today, Kathryn. That wasn’t cool.”

Where’s cheerful, bubbly, weird Selena? “Okay.”

She presses her lips to my forehead. “You’re scared.”

Never mind. She’s back. At least the weird part of her.

“I’m not scared.”

“I can taste it.” She ushers me out the door, anyway. “Stay with Connor and Kiev. They’ll take care of you.”

“I know.”

I stomp out into the black night, stumbling my way over to a faint glow in the woods. After a few more yards, I begin to hear voices.

“There you are!” Coach exclaims when she sees me. “Get over here!”

I shoot everyone an apologetic look. They’re all gathered around a roaring fire that crackles with warmth. Connor smiles at me, as do Endriss and Kiev. Trixie won’t meet my eyes.

I sit down on the frosty grass, folding my knees up under my chin. Everyone else is wearing a jacket.

“Next time, you need to be here earlier,” Coach barks. “I don’t have time for slackers. Understand me, Black?”

I look up at her. Who’s black? Oh yeah, me. Bethany Black.

“Yeah,” I say in a bored monotone, slightly into character. “Fine.”

Coach gives me the evil eye before turning back to the group. “All of you have unique powers. That comes with the beauty of being an Unsortable. But also, with that, comes pain. Anguish. Longing. You’ve all been sent here because you defied the rules and tried to escape. You’ve all endured horrible punishment. Some of you have battle wounds-“ She nods to Endriss. “-and others have lost those close to you.” Now she looks at Trixie who has tears glistening in her eyes. Endriss squeezes her shoulder.

“You all deserve your freedom. But we can only give it to one of you. That’s why you have to fight for this. You have to want it. You have to be willing to utilize your every strength, to rid yourself of weakness. Relationships may suffer. Some of you may be injured. So I’m warning you: this is your last chance. If you’re not willing to give this competition your all, now is the time to back out.”

We all sit in silence for a moment. I glance around at the other faces, illuminated by firelight. We’re all so young. How are we supposed to make such a decision?

Connor leans over to whisper, “You can go. If you want to.”

I shake my head. “I can’t. I have to try.”

And just like that, as my words carry across the silent clearing, everyone relaxes. Frozen stances thaw; expressions are less harried. Coach watches us with somber eyes. Finally, she nods.

“Okay. I see where we stand. Let’s move on, then.”

We all stand. She pairs us up to try fighting techniques.

“Utilize your powers,” She says as I face Endriss. “And don’t kill each other.”

I frown.

“Is that possible?” I hiss, leaning close.

“Go!” Coach yells, before I can get a reply.

Endriss backs away, holding her hands up. For a second, I’m confused. Then my legs begin to go numb, and I understand.

I try to walk forward, but my legs buckle underneath me and I’m down. I end up with a mouthful of dirt. As if I haven’t had enough of that today.

“Hold up!” I say, pushing myself off the ground. But my arms begin to go numb and they, too, are too shivery and weak to support me. Thus, I have more dirt to spit out. Gross.

She giggles as she watches my struggle, clearly thrilled. I try to roll over onto my back but I don’t have strength enough to. Okay. Well. This is much more difficult than I thought it would be.

“Time’s up!” Coach calls.

Immediately, the numbness is lifted from my limbs. I stand easily. Endriss is smiling, looking happier than I’ve seen her in a while.

“I can’t believe that worked!” She exclaims, bounding forward to hug me. “I was positive it wouldn’t. But I have a chance, Kitty. I really think I have a chance.”

I smile at her. “I’m glad.”

She does a little dance. I feel guilty, watching that. Okay, so, if I don’t win this year I can always try again, right?

I look around the clearing. It’s clear who the victors are, here. White-Eyed girl is grinning triumphantly while Trixie stands next to her, looking put out. Wendell is staring at the ground while Tanner looks around with a grin. Felicia looks like she’s about to cry, standing with some freckle-faced boy, and Connor and Josh aren’t looking very friendly. Either of them. I’m guessing Josh won that one.

“Round two…” Coach says, clapping her hands. “Good job, everyone. Some of you were thrown off guard, though. Pay attention. Stay focused. And…go!”

My mind is reeling. Endriss is already at work. I feel the numbness creeping up my legs. Before I can register what I’m doing, I thrust my hands out, palms facing her, and throw her against a tree.

The numbness is gone instantly, once her concentration is broken. I rush over to where she’s laying in an unmoving heap on the ground.

“Oh my gosh, Endriss,” I breathe, falling to my knees beside her. I shake her shoulder. She rolls over. To my relief, she’s smiling.

“That was awesome! Great job!” She sits up.

“Are you okay? I didn’t mean to do it that hard.”

She waves me off. “I’m fine.”

I help her up and we go back to stand in our places, watching everyone else. White-Eyed girl’s skin turns into white electricity, apparently, and she keeps shocking Trixie. I feel bad for her. So, very discreetly, I flick my wrist. This time when White-Eyed girl goes to shock her, she stumbles and falls. Endriss notices, but she doesn’t say anything, just presses her lips together in a thin line.

“You’ve all done extremely well,” Coach says a few minutes later. “I’ll go ahead and give you the night off. It’s close to one, anyway.”

I start to amble back toward the house, but someone grabs my arm. For a second I think it’s Connor or maybe even Trixie, but when I turn around, White-Eyed girl is glaring at me.

“Don’t think I don’t know what you did,” She hisses. Her fingers are digging so hard into my arm I’m certain there’s going to be a bruise.

I try and shake her off, but her grip is firm. “Hey. I didn’t do anything.”

“Yes you did,” She says, giving my arm a rough jerk. The end of her hand turns white and a hot feeling courses up my arm. I finally manage to worm my way out of her grasp.

“Geez! I’m sorry, okay?”

She’s not done, though. She walks forward and roughly pokes at me with her pointer finger. “Don’t do it again. You understand?”

“Hey! Stop that!”

We both turn to Trixie who is rushing up to us, breathless. For a moment, I break into a smile. Until she glares at me.

“I don’t appreciate what you did,” She says. “I can handle Opal by myself.”

White-Eyed Girl (Opal, apparently) scoffs. “Yeah, right.”

“Shut up,” Trixie tells her. Then back to me. “Leave me alone, okay?” Then she’s gone again, hurrying to catch up with the rest of the ground.

Opal grins. “Trouble in paradise?”

I ignore her and turn away. Connor has waited for me. He smiles warily as I come closer.

“What was that about?”

“Nothing.” I lower my shoulders, defeated.

“Hey.” He slings an arm around my shoulders. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Yeah. Sure.” I lean my head against his shoulder.

We get back to the room. Caroline is curled into a silent ball under her comforter. She’s snoring softly. I peel off my socks and change into a more comfortable shirt and pants. Then I slide under the sheets.

It takes me much longer than it should to fall asleep.