Today isn’t just like any other day. Today is my birthday. Today is also my first, and hopefully only, birthday during a widespread pandemic. As I sit here this morning, I have been reflecting on a lot of things. This is set to be the most understated birthday I’ve ever had, and I am surprisingly fine with that. There will be no parties, no visitors, and no decorated cake, despite it being a tradition in our home. There will just be one gift, instead of many, because both of my parents and I can’t work right now during the pandemic. I assured them that it is fine, and it is.

Shrouded is the moon tonight,
The starlight bides its time;
A solitary bat takes flight,
Seeking better clime.

The trees, they shiver restlessly
Awaiting things unknown.
The grasses ripple fitfully;
Earth shudders to her bone.

No cricket song, no croaking frog,
The night bird's call is still;
The very dark enwrapped by fog,
Subject to darker will.

A heavy stillness mutes the air,
The wind now holds its breath;
An unseen power~fey or fair?~
Has forced it still as death.

Staring blankly into the starlight
Yearningly, longingly, tearfully.
Watching the moon meander ‘cross the sky,
I’m thinking and dreaming of you.

Insomnia’s got a hold on me
ADD’s been hounding me
My brain is playing tricks on me
Sweating, striving, pushing.

You’re there—I know you’re there
But who are you, which one?
Darkness shrouds my forward vision
I squint—and stare in vain.

"The Possession"

-The Visitor-

“What can I do ya for today?” the gruff owner of Eilif Inn inquired as he cleaned out a large mug.

Through discerning eyes he stared at a hooded man who had confidently and proudly taken residence at the counter. His entrance had been one of show as he crossed the wooden floor of the inn with a sign of arrogance.

I: run
I tend to run
headlong
into plans
without checking to see if they'll hold
and then
more often than not
I fall
face first
onto the toppled debris
I still run
fall
but now
caution drags at my heels
keeping me from running too hard
but if I run
truly run
I might fly
someday
instead of lying here
crumpled, and trying to be safe

      Maeve shivered as she entered the overly air-conditioned party center through two very large heavy front doors. The heat of the day had been pressing on her bare shoulders ever since the morning sun had risen high into sky, and thus had succeeded in making her feel burdened and uncomfortable. The air inside the hall that was escaping through a large vent in the wall evaporated the moisture from her body as she passed, drying her sticky skin and making the hair in her arm stand on edge. A sigh escaped her throat, partly out of relief and partly out of anxiety.

Every day brings struggles

Moments our souls must decide

To rise above or drop below

Moments to stand or hide.

To love or hate, to do or not do

to be me or just pretend,

I pray that I may have the strength

to not falter in the end.

my heart is heavy
my soul is worn
my tears still flowing
my arms sore

my head is drooped
my legs are weak
quantity wins
I can hardly speak

I can't carry this load
I'm not seeing the signs
I can't walk this road
the do or don'ts, yes or no's, no bright lines

my cry is for an answer
my tears for a touch
my sighing for a Savior
my cowering for Your love

these feelings inside
too strong to ignore
are fighting to pull me around
I feel uninformed

This look in my eyes is a desperate glance in the dark
No weight on my shoulders, but it’s like an anvil to the heart
I can’t find my answers if I don’t know what to ask
I can’t fill my need until I know what I lack
It’s so hard to hold on when the silence is all I hear
Right when I need your arms around me, I find no faith that you are near
It doesn’t just seem like yesterday when everything was fine
How suddenly I’ve lost the joy I thought was mine
Stuck in this confusion, my truth becomes a lie