The next day was worse for Mariah.  She cried inconsolably and didn’t stop all day.  She yelled aloud at God so many times that Miriam and her daughters, who spent much time working in the house and heard every word, couldn’t count all the times that she did.

                “Why?” Mariah asked.  “Why did you have to kill them?  If you loved me, you wouldn’t have done this to me.  You must not love me.  Why don’t you love me?” she demanded.  “You don’t love me, so I don’t love you.  That works out, doesn’t it?  But still, why did you have to kill them?  It’s not fair! They never did anything to deserve death! What did I do to deserve losing them?”

                September dragged by for Mariah.  She was always listless and extremely tired, and sick more than half of the time.  She couldn’t do much more than eat-and she didn’t do much of that-sleep, write in her journal, and lie in bed, think of her family and cry her heart out.

                The Matthews’ children knew that it would be inconsiderate to try to break Mariah out of her unsociable shell, and although they longed to know her better and more, they listened to their parents and left her alone.

                Jon and Miriam were able to connect to the judge that Mr. and Mrs. Freeman had told them about, and were able to start the slow process of being able to adopt Mariah as their own child.

                Leah was especially looking forward to having Mariah as an older sister.  She had felt a special connection to her cousin and already loved her only as a child could love another.

                Micaiah and Jason didn’t really want another sister, but their knowing that this was best for Mariah overruled their personal opinions, and they did all that they could so that their parents could talk to the judge figure things out, and complete paperwork.

                Gabrielle and Danielle were delighted with the numerous chances that they received to cook meals with their parents busy.  Every lunch, breakfast and dinner was prepared ‘par excellence’, as Jason said half-jokingly, and they did their best to tempt Mariah’s appetite, which was slowly shrinking, bit by bit, every week.

                Jon and Miriam became more and more concerned with Mariah’s now frail state.  The vibrant, lively  fifteen year old had turned into a mere shadow in a matter of weeks-days, even-and although they knew she was still grieving for her family, they were worried that she would waste away if someone didn’t help her-and soon.

               

                Miriam was busy writing yet another letter to the judge and talking on the telephone at the same time when Leah ran into the room.  Her usually cheerful voice and countenance were loaded with worry and anxiety.

                “Mama!” she cried.  “Mariah needs help!”

                Miriam quickly excused herself from talking on the phone and turned to Leah.  “What are you talking about?”

                “She looks really, really sick, and she’s thrashing around and groaning and moaning like she’s never going to stop,” Leah explained.

                Miriam leapt to her feet.  “Go get Daddy, Leah.  Tell him to come to Mariah’s room quickly.”

               

                “Daddy!”

                Jon looked up as he paused his work. “What is it, Leah?”

                “Mommy needs you! Something’s wrong with Mariah.” Leah took off for the house.

                 Jon dropped his hoe and ran off after her.

 

                When he arrived at Mariah’s room, out of breath and tired, he saw that Miriam had been able to calm Mariah down and put her in her bed in a nightgown.

                “She’s burning up,” Miriam murmured to him.  “Lack of food is really making this worse than it should be.  She’s so delirious that she thinks she died in the tornado and went to heaven with her whole family.”

                Jon’s eyes widened and he chewed on his lip and thought hard as he went over and stood by the bed.  “That’s bad.”

                “I’ll call the doctor-or how about the hospital?” Miriam wondered.

                “I’d call the hospital,” Jon said quickly.  “This is probably too bad for our doctor to deal with.”

                Miriam hurried off.

 

                “What’s that?”

                Micaiah looked up as Jason spoke.  “What’s what?”

                “Those shrill noises.  It sounds like-an ambulance.”

                Micaiah listened closely.  “You’re right,” he said, puzzled.  “What’s an ambulance doing out here in the country?”

                Jason shrugged as he went back to weeding.  “You got me.”

                Micaiah shook his head as he followed suit.

                They listened quietly as the noises got louder and louder until they looked up and saw an ambulance roaring down the road.  They looked at each other and then looked back.

                The ambulance slowed as it approached the Matthews’ driveway and turned in.

                Jason dropped his hoe.  “What happened?”

                “I don’t know, but I’m going to find out!” Micaiah threw aside his garden tool and sprinted off.

                Jason was quick to follow.

 

                By the time they reached the house, the ambulance had been loaded with whoever the victim was and Jon had climbed in with the medical team and victim.  The vehicle roared away.

                Miriam, who was standing on the porch, turned to go back inside.

                “Mom, what happened?  What’s wrong?  Who left?” Jason blurted out.

                “Mariah,” Miriam said briefly before going back into the house.

                “Oh,” Jason and Micaiah said simultaneously.

                Leah burst out the front door.  “Is the ambulance gone?”

                “Yes.  What happened to Mariah?” Jason asked.

                “She’s sick,” Leah answered matter-of-factly.

                Jason rolled his eyes.  “With what?”

                “Fever and ‘alirium,” Leah replied.

                “‘Alirium’…...?” Jason questioned.

                “Delirium,” Micaiah corrected Leah.  “She said lots of strange things?” he asked his little sister.

                Lean nodded.  “Uh-huh.  I found her and I was scared, so I ran and told Mommy, and Mommy told me to get Daddy, and Daddy came, and Mommy called the hospital, and the ambulance came and took away Daddy and Mariah.”

                “They’re the only ones here who know what’s going on,” Micaiah grumbled, “and they won’t give us many details.”

                “We’ll find out eventually,” Jason assured him.  “We are, after all, the two oldest children at home.”

                “True,” Micaiah admitted, quieting as Miriam came back out of the house.

                “Boys,” she said, “clean up your tools and come in for lunch.”

                They obeyed and twenty minutes later, all the children and Miriam were seated around the dinner table and eating a delectable meal of green salad with chicken and pecans.

                “Mom, what’s going on?” Jason asked through a mouthful of salad.

                Miriam put down her fork and looked at him thoughtfully.  “Leah found Mariah in delirium.”

                Micaiah put down his fork.  “I should have guessed that something bad was coming, but I was so busy…that I didn’t think about it.”

                “I don’t blame you,” Miriam said gently.  “You and Jason and Gabrielle and Danielle have had to pick up more of the workload again, like when your father and I went away. It’s alright.  Don’t feel too bad.”

                “Mommy, when will Mariah get better?” Leah piped up.

                Miriam turned to her.  “I don’t know.  But if God wills it, she will soon be back among us in a much better condition.”

                “Can we pray for her in devotions tonight?” Leah requested.

                “Yes.”  Miriam smiled at the six year old.  Inside, she was wondering, Is Mariah’s staying here changing something in my little Leah?  She seems more thoughtful and more obedient than she ever has been!

                Gabrielle spoke up, breaking Miriam’s thoughts.  “Should Leah sleep with me again, like she did before Mariah came?”

                “No, please don’t move me,” Leah begged.  “I still want to sleep there.  Mariah will come back soon, and when she does, I want to be there.”

                “Yes, that’s alright,” Miriam agreed.

                Jon rubbed his eyes wearily.  He was so tired and so hungry…..

                “Sir?”a voice interrupted his quiet, and Jon’s eyes popped open.  “Would you like some food?”

                Jon gratefully accepted the tray from the young nurse in front of him and thanked her.

                She left and Jon sat, prayed, and began to eat the roasted chicken with rice and bread, and fruit yogurt for dessert.

                He was about halfway through his meal when the door to the nearly empty waiting room opened again and the doctor helping with Mariah walked in.

                “Sir, your daughter’s condition has stabilized.  Would you like to come see her?”

                Jon nearly rolled his eyes and sighed.  She’s not my daughter yet! he thought almost grumpily.  He spoke aloud.  “Yes, thank you, I’ll come see her."

               

                Mariah was lying on her hospital bed, her chest rising and falling with each ragged breath that she pushed out.  Her face was red and flushed with fever.

                Jon sat beside her bed on a chair.  “Is it really as bad as it looks, Doctor Julien?”

                “Unfortunately, yes,” the doctor replied.  He looked at Jon closely.  “How has she been in the past month?”

                “She lost her family in a tornado and is in such a state of grief that she will eat almost nothing and do nothing but lie on her bed or sit around and cry, to cut it short,” Jon said.

                “That’s all she did…all day, every day?” the doctor asked, staring at him curiously.

                “Yes,” Jon answered.  “We tried to get her to eat, but she touched almost nothing.  She drank more water than she ate food, and even that wasn’t much.”

                “She hasn’t been through anything else-?” the doctor queried.

                “If you’re assuming that this happened at the hands of me and my family, you’re wrong,” Jon stated firmly.  “If this happened as a result of…abuse…then I wouldn’t bring her to the hospital, would I?  And do I look like someone who would do this to family?”

                “No, and no,” the doctor admitted.  “I believe you, Mr. Matthews, but I hope you realize that it is my duty to help my patient, and that means I have to know what has been going on with their health in the weeks before the hospitalization.”

                Jon nodded.  “I understand.”  He looked at Mariah.  “How long will she be here?”

                “We don’t know,” the doctor said.  “But we would be guessing from one and a half to three weeks.”

                Jon looked almost incredulous.  “Are you serious?” he asked in amazement.  “I knew her condition was bad…but is it really, really that bad?”

                “It is most unfortunate, but…yes.  We had to give her breathing aid, which she still has to have, and we have to give her nourishment through tubes, not to mention the medicine for her fever and her clogged up lungs. And you also said that she drank almost nothing, which goes along with our observation that she was very dehydrated.”

                “How did her lungs clog up?”

                “She must have been exposed to a cold virus in your home,” the doctor replied, “because soon after she arrived, she was coughing so much that she couldn’t breathe.”

                Jon rubbed his forehead.  “Poor little girl….only orphaned for a little over a month and still in such a state of grief.”

                The doctor shook his head.  “I need to leave for a moment.  Just ring the bell if you need help.”

                Jon nodded in understanding, and the doctor departed.

 

                Where is all the light coming from?  Is that my family?  Am I in heaven?