Today is always waiting,
Yesterday has always been,
Tomorrow is a question,
What might it bring?
What will the morning bring?
What will the evening tell?
What will afternoon say?
What will all these tell?
Will it be important?
Will it change a life?
Will it bring joyful songs?
Or nothing, save woe and strife?
What may be done
With the time we have?
What will all this come to?
So we will always wonder.
Smile 'til the day is done.
'Til all is passed to gray.
Smile as you always can.
Smile 'til the coming day.
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This has some issues. Any help would be greatly appreciated.
Comments
very good!
It is a lovely poem, but there are just one or two things I noticed. It seems that some of the time you have a definite rhyme scheme and then you say something that doesn't work for it. And in the second stanza, the repeated word "tell" is a bit redundant...maybe you can find something else that rhymes with it or a different way of saying what you want to say. Besides that I can't think of anything wrong with it. It really is a very good poem. :-D
Katie:-)
"Are all humans like this? So much bigger on the inside?"
-Idris/TARDIS
Katiesara-Yes. Those are the
Katiesara-Yes. Those are the problems I'm having. When I wrote this I couldn't think of anything; and when I got back to it, I was in a different frame of mind, so nothing seemed to fit. Thanks
OGF- Thank you
Kendra--Glad you liked it.
"It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather we should thank God such men lived."
General George S. Patton
Very well done, good job!
Very well done, good job!
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"Are you sure this water is sanitary? It looks questionable to me! But what about bacteria?"--Tantor the elephant from Tarzan.
Issues? What issues? I
Issues? What issues? I thought it was lovely! Keep up the good work!
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"To produce a mighty book, you must choose a mighty theme. No great and enduring volume can ever be written on the flea, though many there be that have tried it." -- Herman Melville