The Empty Girl

Submitted by Emilee on Sat, 12/21/2013 - 23:20

*waves dramatically* HI!! haha, this time last year I couldn't stop wondering "What am I gonna do after I graduate?"..Now i'm astounded that I used to have free time. I'm taking creative writing classes online, and the last one took was mostly ...erm, essay? yeah, we'll go with that one..The last class I took was Essay/personal exploration type writing, so I didn't have much time to write poetry or fiction. But, guess who has a 2 week break :)!
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The Empty Girl,
Wrapped in a mirror
All Icy blue
All that can be seen is you

In poverty, in wealth
In sickness, in health

The Empty girl,
appears to know it all
to have felt
all that you have ever been through

Mirrors hiding in a maze
Fakeness masking the daze

The Empty Girl,
floating above the ground
nothing to
tether her feet to the dirty earth

Nothing left to grow dreams
She is not how she seems

The Empty Girl,
Make-up covering the scars
and shielding
her wounds from the freezing stares

No heart left, no dreams remain
Once upon a time left a stain

Author's age when written
18
Genre

Comments

Hi! Not sure if I've ever read any of your stuff before..

Thanks for your comment on my poetry the other day, appreciate it!

I think the ideas behind the poem is fantastic. They could be expanded upon much more. I read a couple of your other poems and the one thing that annoys me is the rhyming. Might sound like harsh criticism but I think you could cut back a lot on the rhyming. Try experimenting without it. It will come in time, as will the rhythm to go along with it, but sometimes rhyming can be done without.

JUST realised this was posted two years ago...whoops...

Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can’t we just go back to page one and start all over again?” – Winnie The Pooh