Valentines #2

Submitted by Caleb on Sat, 02/16/2019 - 23:18

The Fiction Lover
You made it simple – suddenly simple for me,
So long caught up in life’s philosophy,
Like some character in Dostoevsky.
For you I could be a prince, handsome and tall.
And you with glittering gown, the beauty of the ball,
Adorned with jewels fair and brighter than them all.

~

The Obsequious Manipulator
If you should leave me now, my dearest dear,
You’d be a faithless jilt — a lady-cad —
For you are mine, and all the world may hear
The many proofs of that that I have had!

I’ve held the door for you, and you went through,
I've often helped you put your coat on too.
At picture times (there’s proof!) I've gently placed
My arm (you didn’t protest) around your waist.

~

The Conscientious One
She’s like a lovely island beach
Where gently laps the turquoise sea,
Where breadfruit grows in easy reach
And warm winds blow among the trees.

But I who see this sunlit land
And tell to you fair beauty’s tale,
Must not come near that golden sand
For she’s a beach, but I’m a whale.

Author's age when written
28
Genre

Comments

The last one of these is my favourite.

And he was just wondering, for he was a severe critic of his own work, whether that last line couldn't be polished up a bit...
~P.G. Wodehouse

Though most people would find the sentiment of the second one unpleasant when it is as ridiculously, baldly, stated as it is in the poem, I think many of those people are still susceptible to this kind of manipulation in life.

And he was just wondering, for he was a severe critic of his own work, whether that last line couldn't be polished up a bit...
~P.G. Wodehouse

Ooh, the last one is my favorite, too! But all of them were amazing. I'm a big fan of your imagery, because I have somewhat a raging imagination, so I just love reading poetry that feeds it in a good way. Your poetry does that for me, so thank you for finding Apricot Pie and sharing it!

Introverts unite!
Separately!
From the comfort of your own homes!

I'm glad they stoked your imagination. Knowing an image/idea you've written has connected with someone else's imagination, gives hope to any writer:)

And he was just wondering, for he was a severe critic of his own work, whether that last line couldn't be polished up a bit...
~P.G. Wodehouse

Both sets of Valentines are really good! The last one's imagery reminds me of images used in the Song of Songs. (Except for the last line, perhaps. But that was part of the intrigue of the poem. Because of the imagery I thought you were going towards a "keep the foxes out of the garden" image but instead, you turned it to unreachability.)

The second one struck a chord. lololol

I am all for chivalry, but I'm hyper-aware of manipulation . . . srsly dude you think I don't know why you're holding this door open? And yesssss some girls give get deceived by that easily - or at least can reasonably trick themselves into believing him.

I liked the sound of The Cynic. And the images. It captures a lot of the atmosphere people seem to have around dating nowadays, with the swiping left and right . . .

And I loved The Original. Not just for the sentiment, but also because kudos for putting that much rhyme into a poem and keeping it flowing seamlessly. :)

I was just thinking about Song of Solomon because as usual around Valentine's day I saw some jokes on its unusual imagery (as if we'd rather have stale clichés!) ... but I think it's very beautiful and full of life! So thanks!

I too am all for chivalry; what I'm against is the lady being made to feel that she is bound or committed by something the chevalier does or says. And that whole 'at picture time' thing is kinda creepsville.

Maybe we just live in a potato-chip bag kind of culture.

Glad you enjoyed the Original :)

And he was just wondering, for he was a severe critic of his own work, whether that last line couldn't be polished up a bit...
~P.G. Wodehouse